We have all done it at some point or another. Well, you have if you are a girl. What am I talking about? Wanting to be like your mother. Sure, when you get to be a teenager you can't stand her and when you become a mother, you find yourself sounding like her. But when you are little, you look at her and think, "I want to be just like her." And I have now experienced what it is like to be on the other side of that.
My little girl is a handful. She is sassy beyond belief, opinionated, and bossy. And she is only 2 years old. I guess I deserve a girl like that considering that everyone says she is just like me and sometimes she drives me crazy. But lately she has entered that realm of wanting to be like me. She talks to her baby dolls the way I talk to her and her brothers. When her dolls get in trouble, she says the same things I say to her when she is in trouble. She tries to nurse her babies like I do with her baby brother (that part is a little weird but what am I gonna do?). And she likes to put them in her shirt to simulate the way I carry the baby around in my sling. She watches me closely and mimics my every move. She even wears her purse like I do.
Today, she got mad because her baby wouldn't fit in the shirt that she was wearing. So, I got out the extra piece to my K'TAN (the sling) and tied it to her for her to wear her baby. As I looked at my daughter trying to be just like me, I became incredibly humbled. What in the world have I done that someone would look up to me like she does? That I would have someone who wants to be just like me? I don't deserve that kind of admiration. Then I started thinking about the things I am teaching her. The immense weight of my job as a mother came crashing down on me in one of those rare moments when everday life stops and you realize the impact you are having on a human life. I am responsible for teaching her everything - right from wrong, how to love, how to be angry, how to react when things don't go as planned, how to treat people, how to live. I'm far from perfect and when I see her imitate me in my not-so-great moments, I feel ashamed that I have taught my daughter these things. When she looks at me and tries to mimic my motions, it makes me laugh.
All of this has made me realize that I am not enough. I am not enough when it comes to teaching her how to be. The only way that I will teach my daughter, and my sons for that matter, is to give my life to Jesus everyday. He is the only one who can make me see my screw ups and help me to fix them. He is the only one who can make me into a good example for my children. I will still mess up, but He will use that for His glory in some way that I can't see or imagine. I only hope that I am wise enough to ask for His help and not try to do it on my own. We all know how that would turn out! Yikes!
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Thursday, December 1, 2011
I'm baaaaack! And I hate double standards.
I'm back after a looong hiatus and I'm a little irritated. I read something on Facebook last night as I was trying to sleep and it made me angry. This morning the actual anger has subsided and I am now miffed, if you will. So, my return will be in the form of a political tirade but I promise that they won't all be like this. I do need to get this off of my chest.
So I read an article last night from a friend's facebook page about Chik-fil-a and gay rights. I have read a similar article before, but this one was written by a gay-right's activist and it was filled with hate and anger. What made me more mad is that this was posted for people to "educate" themselves on the issue. This can hardly be called a education and I will explain why. Here is a link to the article before I go on so that you will be familiar with it and my rant will make sense.
http://news.change.org/stories/yes-chick-fil-a-says-we-explicitly-do-not-like-same-sex-couples
Let's begin with the topic of the bias and the concept of fact checking. This article is obviously on a gay-rights website so I expected a definite bias toward that side. I mean, it is a blog after all not a news source. However, the amount of anger and hate spewed in this article was uncalled for. This story was meant to incite anger in people and it clearly did its job when you look at the comments. What makes me mad about this is that people are getting angry about something of which they next to nothing. The use of the words "anti-gay" and the title itself are incorrect with what CFA and the affiliates mentioned in the article said. "Anti-gay" makes it sound like they hate gay people and that is not true. Not only am I familiar with most of these groups, I am also familiar with their stance on gay marriage because I feel the same way (don't pretend to be shocked here). They do not hate gay people, they disagree with their lifestyle on a Biblical basis. As a matter of fact, Focus on the Family was run by Dr. James Dobson who has written in his book Bringing Up Boys that homosexuality is not chosen (pg. 115-116); the only choice is whether to act on it. How many Christian men have you met that actually say that? Most Christians in general would balk at that idea until they thought about it, yet this is the organization that is getting criticized in this article.
In addition, the WINSHAPE foundation is criticized for its policy about homosexual couples at its retreat. First of all, they were very polite to the people inquiring about said policy. Only when pushed were they frank and even so that was a polite response. Also, this is a private foundation that can allow whomever it wants into its retreat. Criticizing them is like saying I'm mad at a counrty club for not letting me in because I don't make enough money or I'm mad at Susan G. Comen for only supporting breast cancer and not lung cancer. That's ridiculous. Find another retreat to go to and get over it.
Along with that note comes the fact that CFA and its franchises are privately owned and operated. They have the right in America to support whomever they choose. They have to right to give money or free food to whichever organization they want and shouldn't have to face opposition because of it. I'm pretty sure we still live in a country that has freedom of religion and speech. Of course sometimes that seems to only apply to religions other than Christianity and people other than Christians. If we offend anyone publicly for saying what our Bible says we have to apologize publicly and do endless amounts of volunteer work for that group before we are forgiven. However, articles like this can be published and passed around and we are supposed to sit there and take it. But back to CFA. Boycott them if you want, but remember you have the liberty to do so just like they have the liberty to support whatever cause they want and its like they are supporting an organzition that is out to kill all gay people. They just disagree with their lifestyle and are expressing that belief by supporting others who feel the same. It's like when I vote, I vote for someone who shares my moral beliefs. Are you going to villianize me for expressing my belief that way too?
Another thing I take issue with is where this person talks about how CFA will take a gay person's money at a restaurant but supports "anti-gay" orgs. They say they respect gay people and apparently, for this person, that doesn't make sense. Well, let me explain it for you. Jesus showed people respect all the time even if he didn't agree with their lifestyle. The Pharisees were the leaders in his day and they desperately hated Jesus. Yet, he never spewed hatred at them. Instead, he strove to teach them logically and compassionately even when they rejected what he said. Even when he was dying a horrific death at their hands, he prayed for them. If this is not respect and love for a person or people, I don't know what is. As Christians, we are to strive to be like Christ and although we often fail (because we are humans) it doesn't mean we don't try. I feel like this is what CFA is trying to do. If they turned away gay people at their restaurants, it would be a great disservice to the name Christian. You can love and respect someone without having to agree with what they are doing. As I have had to do in my own family (and no, it has nothing to do with homosexuality), I have said "I love you but I can't support your decisions." And that is that. I don't know how to make it plainer.
One of my last points is this: Christians get a bad wrap for not being open-minded. This is a load of crap. Yes, there are those out there who are not open-minded but there are those in every group. That's like saying all Muslims are terrorists or all blondes are stupid. It is a gross overstatement and it needs to stop. Just because I don't agree with you, does not make me close-minded. It means I have an opinion and I stand for something. It may not be the same as your opinion but that doesn't make it wrong. As a matter of fact, if you can't accept that then it makes YOU close-minded, not me. People want Christians to be tolerant of others but really that means they want us to lay down and take whatever they want to dish out at us. And I'm sorry but Christ calls us to a higher standard and I care way more about his opinion of me than I do yours. Like I said before, I love people because God loves people; that doesn't mean I have to agree with or like what you do. I only wish this sentiment went both ways.
I just want to make one final point and then I promise I am done. This article is treating CFA and the organizations it supports like they are Westboro Baptist Church. They are not. They do not hold signs outside their establishments that say "God hates fags" or other hateful things. Those people are not Christians in the Biblical sense, whatever they may say. If you will look at the websites of the organizations that have been villianized, you will see no hate. Instead you will see companies that are standing for something they believe in, and they are doing so in a civil way. You may not agree with them and that is fine, but why don't you give them the same courtesy? Tolerance goes both ways my friend. Again, this person did little to no research about the companies he was setting people against and unfortuantely most of those people will just take his word for it. I hope you don't.
And that is all. Whew!
So I read an article last night from a friend's facebook page about Chik-fil-a and gay rights. I have read a similar article before, but this one was written by a gay-right's activist and it was filled with hate and anger. What made me more mad is that this was posted for people to "educate" themselves on the issue. This can hardly be called a education and I will explain why. Here is a link to the article before I go on so that you will be familiar with it and my rant will make sense.
http://news.change.org/stories/yes-chick-fil-a-says-we-explicitly-do-not-like-same-sex-couples
Let's begin with the topic of the bias and the concept of fact checking. This article is obviously on a gay-rights website so I expected a definite bias toward that side. I mean, it is a blog after all not a news source. However, the amount of anger and hate spewed in this article was uncalled for. This story was meant to incite anger in people and it clearly did its job when you look at the comments. What makes me mad about this is that people are getting angry about something of which they next to nothing. The use of the words "anti-gay" and the title itself are incorrect with what CFA and the affiliates mentioned in the article said. "Anti-gay" makes it sound like they hate gay people and that is not true. Not only am I familiar with most of these groups, I am also familiar with their stance on gay marriage because I feel the same way (don't pretend to be shocked here). They do not hate gay people, they disagree with their lifestyle on a Biblical basis. As a matter of fact, Focus on the Family was run by Dr. James Dobson who has written in his book Bringing Up Boys that homosexuality is not chosen (pg. 115-116); the only choice is whether to act on it. How many Christian men have you met that actually say that? Most Christians in general would balk at that idea until they thought about it, yet this is the organization that is getting criticized in this article.
In addition, the WINSHAPE foundation is criticized for its policy about homosexual couples at its retreat. First of all, they were very polite to the people inquiring about said policy. Only when pushed were they frank and even so that was a polite response. Also, this is a private foundation that can allow whomever it wants into its retreat. Criticizing them is like saying I'm mad at a counrty club for not letting me in because I don't make enough money or I'm mad at Susan G. Comen for only supporting breast cancer and not lung cancer. That's ridiculous. Find another retreat to go to and get over it.
Along with that note comes the fact that CFA and its franchises are privately owned and operated. They have the right in America to support whomever they choose. They have to right to give money or free food to whichever organization they want and shouldn't have to face opposition because of it. I'm pretty sure we still live in a country that has freedom of religion and speech. Of course sometimes that seems to only apply to religions other than Christianity and people other than Christians. If we offend anyone publicly for saying what our Bible says we have to apologize publicly and do endless amounts of volunteer work for that group before we are forgiven. However, articles like this can be published and passed around and we are supposed to sit there and take it. But back to CFA. Boycott them if you want, but remember you have the liberty to do so just like they have the liberty to support whatever cause they want and its like they are supporting an organzition that is out to kill all gay people. They just disagree with their lifestyle and are expressing that belief by supporting others who feel the same. It's like when I vote, I vote for someone who shares my moral beliefs. Are you going to villianize me for expressing my belief that way too?
Another thing I take issue with is where this person talks about how CFA will take a gay person's money at a restaurant but supports "anti-gay" orgs. They say they respect gay people and apparently, for this person, that doesn't make sense. Well, let me explain it for you. Jesus showed people respect all the time even if he didn't agree with their lifestyle. The Pharisees were the leaders in his day and they desperately hated Jesus. Yet, he never spewed hatred at them. Instead, he strove to teach them logically and compassionately even when they rejected what he said. Even when he was dying a horrific death at their hands, he prayed for them. If this is not respect and love for a person or people, I don't know what is. As Christians, we are to strive to be like Christ and although we often fail (because we are humans) it doesn't mean we don't try. I feel like this is what CFA is trying to do. If they turned away gay people at their restaurants, it would be a great disservice to the name Christian. You can love and respect someone without having to agree with what they are doing. As I have had to do in my own family (and no, it has nothing to do with homosexuality), I have said "I love you but I can't support your decisions." And that is that. I don't know how to make it plainer.
One of my last points is this: Christians get a bad wrap for not being open-minded. This is a load of crap. Yes, there are those out there who are not open-minded but there are those in every group. That's like saying all Muslims are terrorists or all blondes are stupid. It is a gross overstatement and it needs to stop. Just because I don't agree with you, does not make me close-minded. It means I have an opinion and I stand for something. It may not be the same as your opinion but that doesn't make it wrong. As a matter of fact, if you can't accept that then it makes YOU close-minded, not me. People want Christians to be tolerant of others but really that means they want us to lay down and take whatever they want to dish out at us. And I'm sorry but Christ calls us to a higher standard and I care way more about his opinion of me than I do yours. Like I said before, I love people because God loves people; that doesn't mean I have to agree with or like what you do. I only wish this sentiment went both ways.
I just want to make one final point and then I promise I am done. This article is treating CFA and the organizations it supports like they are Westboro Baptist Church. They are not. They do not hold signs outside their establishments that say "God hates fags" or other hateful things. Those people are not Christians in the Biblical sense, whatever they may say. If you will look at the websites of the organizations that have been villianized, you will see no hate. Instead you will see companies that are standing for something they believe in, and they are doing so in a civil way. You may not agree with them and that is fine, but why don't you give them the same courtesy? Tolerance goes both ways my friend. Again, this person did little to no research about the companies he was setting people against and unfortuantely most of those people will just take his word for it. I hope you don't.
And that is all. Whew!
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Funny Things Nolan says
So it's only 8 am and already I have had cause to laugh because of my son. He always get a packet of Go-gurt in the morning. Go-gurt, in case you don't know, is yogurt in a squeezable package so there is less mess. Anyway, he yells from the living room "Mama, my yogurt isn't working. Oh, cause it's not open. Hahahahaha." What makes it better is that this sounded exactly like I do when I do something dumb. Hilarious.
Twenty minutes later he tells me that he really wants it to snow, like I can help that. So I tell him to pray about it because God is the one who decides those things. So he starts to pray (while going to the bathroom, which I think makes this funnier). "Dear Jesus, make it snow, please. So I can go out in the snow and then come open my presents. So make it snow, please. Amen." Soooo cute, right? I love that kid.
Twenty minutes later he tells me that he really wants it to snow, like I can help that. So I tell him to pray about it because God is the one who decides those things. So he starts to pray (while going to the bathroom, which I think makes this funnier). "Dear Jesus, make it snow, please. So I can go out in the snow and then come open my presents. So make it snow, please. Amen." Soooo cute, right? I love that kid.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Things I love but don't understand
There are some things in this life that I love but don't really understand, hence the title. Here are a few of those things.
1. Happy hour. Great concept, and I love it. However, it is never just an hour long. It's usually like 4 hours long. So shouldn't it be Happy Time or Happy Hours? Maybe it's just me.
2. The song "If I die young" by the Band Perry. This is a very catchy song and I really like it but what is it about? Obviously about dying young but is it about her or someone they know or what? I don't know. I need an explanation.
3. Boys. Like, why do they show love by hitting each other? How can they be BFF after getting into a fist fight?
4. The stock market. Ok, I don't actually love the stock market per se, I just don't get how it works.
5. Justin Bieber. I don't love him either, I just want someone to please tell me why he is so famous. Along with the cast of Jersey Shore and most celebutants.
So there they are. I only love 3 of the 5 but still, if anyone can explain any of these things to me I will be most grateful.
1. Happy hour. Great concept, and I love it. However, it is never just an hour long. It's usually like 4 hours long. So shouldn't it be Happy Time or Happy Hours? Maybe it's just me.
2. The song "If I die young" by the Band Perry. This is a very catchy song and I really like it but what is it about? Obviously about dying young but is it about her or someone they know or what? I don't know. I need an explanation.
3. Boys. Like, why do they show love by hitting each other? How can they be BFF after getting into a fist fight?
4. The stock market. Ok, I don't actually love the stock market per se, I just don't get how it works.
5. Justin Bieber. I don't love him either, I just want someone to please tell me why he is so famous. Along with the cast of Jersey Shore and most celebutants.
So there they are. I only love 3 of the 5 but still, if anyone can explain any of these things to me I will be most grateful.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Funny Things Nolan Says
So here's a couple more funny things that just happened today:
We are at Olive Garden and while the waiter is handing us our check Nolan says..."My butt is so sweaty!" This is followed by an awkward pause and laughter.
He likes to quote movies, especially Cars, but lately he is has been quoting the line from Toy Story, "You have saved our lives! We are eternally grateful."
We are at Olive Garden and while the waiter is handing us our check Nolan says..."My butt is so sweaty!" This is followed by an awkward pause and laughter.
He likes to quote movies, especially Cars, but lately he is has been quoting the line from Toy Story, "You have saved our lives! We are eternally grateful."
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Help me out here people!
Hello again. I am a little frustrated today so let me begin with a little background and then, my rant.
Due to a sequence of events which I don't care to recall (ok, my husband broke the couch he made me buy a year ago that I hate after I told him it was about to break but he did nothing about), I went to a furniture store to buy a new couch. While there, we also bought a new recliner because my husband loves them (I hate them). I also happened upon a bedroom suit that I had been after for years that was on sale. It was the floor model and they were not going to be offering it again so it was a sweet deal that I couldn't pass up. After some butt-kissing and negotiation, it was mine! This new furniture is going to be delivered Thursday so I have to get rid of the old crap, I mean, stuff (hey it has lasted since both my husband and I were in high school, I guess it's pretty good).
So, I go on a website where people can post things they need to sell, kind of like a yard sale...Anyway, wonderful website and I actually do love it. I posted last night and by 7:30 this morning I had 9 responses in my inbox. Herein lies my problem and the subject of my rant. I chose a lady who said she was desperate for furniture. She didn't ask for a reduced price like some people and I am a nice person so I wanted to help her out. I email her back and no response. I wait a few hours and still...nothing. Seriously?! So, I decided to call one of the other people. No answer. No return phone call. Why people? You say you want the stuff today and I want it gone today. So answer me already!
I know what you are saying "Bianca, you are a stay-at-home mome. Some people have jobs and cannot be near a computer or phone." And I say to you, "First of all, I know none of those kinds of people. All my friends are always near a computer or phone. Second, you are right and I have thought of this." But this is what I am thinking: tell me that. Yeah, I know. Novel idea, huh? But seriously, think about it. What if you said, "Hey, I want to buy this stuff but I will not be available between these hours to answer an email or phone call. I will get back to you after this certain time"? Is that so hard? I think not!
So hopefully these people will get back to me because the rest of my customers aren't going to wait forever. And thus ends my rant. Thank you for your time and attention.
Due to a sequence of events which I don't care to recall (ok, my husband broke the couch he made me buy a year ago that I hate after I told him it was about to break but he did nothing about), I went to a furniture store to buy a new couch. While there, we also bought a new recliner because my husband loves them (I hate them). I also happened upon a bedroom suit that I had been after for years that was on sale. It was the floor model and they were not going to be offering it again so it was a sweet deal that I couldn't pass up. After some butt-kissing and negotiation, it was mine! This new furniture is going to be delivered Thursday so I have to get rid of the old crap, I mean, stuff (hey it has lasted since both my husband and I were in high school, I guess it's pretty good).
So, I go on a website where people can post things they need to sell, kind of like a yard sale...Anyway, wonderful website and I actually do love it. I posted last night and by 7:30 this morning I had 9 responses in my inbox. Herein lies my problem and the subject of my rant. I chose a lady who said she was desperate for furniture. She didn't ask for a reduced price like some people and I am a nice person so I wanted to help her out. I email her back and no response. I wait a few hours and still...nothing. Seriously?! So, I decided to call one of the other people. No answer. No return phone call. Why people? You say you want the stuff today and I want it gone today. So answer me already!
I know what you are saying "Bianca, you are a stay-at-home mome. Some people have jobs and cannot be near a computer or phone." And I say to you, "First of all, I know none of those kinds of people. All my friends are always near a computer or phone. Second, you are right and I have thought of this." But this is what I am thinking: tell me that. Yeah, I know. Novel idea, huh? But seriously, think about it. What if you said, "Hey, I want to buy this stuff but I will not be available between these hours to answer an email or phone call. I will get back to you after this certain time"? Is that so hard? I think not!
So hopefully these people will get back to me because the rest of my customers aren't going to wait forever. And thus ends my rant. Thank you for your time and attention.
Friday, November 26, 2010
I'm in love
Ugh! Ok, people, I have to tell you something. I'm in love. I am stupidly, deeply, and passionately in love. With whom, you ask? Well, it's complicated. I am equally in love with several people and I don't know what to do. The names are as follows: Jimmy Choo, Manolo Blahnik, and Christian LeBoutin.
They all understand, of course. They are willing to split me amongst themselves. There is one person is not willing to share me, though. My wallet. It says, "No, Bianca. Love only me. Don't break my heart by swiping that debit card that lies within me. I love you and you need to eat. Your children need to eat." It makes total sense, obviously, in my head. But the heart wants what the heart wants.
This all began when I was reading Mini Shopaholic and she was buying things on eBay. And I thought, "Hey. Why did I never think to look for those on there?" Where I live, there aren't any places to buy such wonderous, beautiful treasures. I thought they were out of my reach. But I was forgetting about a most glorious invention called the INTERNET. I know, it's ridiculous of me to forget that in this day and age but I did so let's get over it. So I got on eBay and what did I see? Hundreds of beautiful shoes, some in my size, that I cannot afford. Tragedy had struck.
I have had this love affair with shoes since college when I got married to a man that doesn't ever really say no. I'm THAT girl that has a million shoes. As a matter of fact, my foot got slightly larger after having children and some of my favorites dont fit me anymore but I can't bear to give them away. Included in this tragic story are my Burberry sandals that I bought on Via Condotti in Rome. Those will stay with me forever.
So, this is where I am now, admiring my lovers from afar. Maybe one day I will find out that I have a rich uncle somewhere that died and left me millions so my lovers and I can unite. Or maybe I am in fact distantly related to one of these designers and we will one day find each other, bond over our love of shoes and live happily ever after. Until then I will content myself to look at their images on the computer whenever I feel the need.
Although, come to think of it, they do cheat on me a lot with other feet. Some with feet that are way uglier than mine and some with famous feet (stupid golddiggers). Ah, who am I kidding? I love them anyway.
They all understand, of course. They are willing to split me amongst themselves. There is one person is not willing to share me, though. My wallet. It says, "No, Bianca. Love only me. Don't break my heart by swiping that debit card that lies within me. I love you and you need to eat. Your children need to eat." It makes total sense, obviously, in my head. But the heart wants what the heart wants.
This all began when I was reading Mini Shopaholic and she was buying things on eBay. And I thought, "Hey. Why did I never think to look for those on there?" Where I live, there aren't any places to buy such wonderous, beautiful treasures. I thought they were out of my reach. But I was forgetting about a most glorious invention called the INTERNET. I know, it's ridiculous of me to forget that in this day and age but I did so let's get over it. So I got on eBay and what did I see? Hundreds of beautiful shoes, some in my size, that I cannot afford. Tragedy had struck.
I have had this love affair with shoes since college when I got married to a man that doesn't ever really say no. I'm THAT girl that has a million shoes. As a matter of fact, my foot got slightly larger after having children and some of my favorites dont fit me anymore but I can't bear to give them away. Included in this tragic story are my Burberry sandals that I bought on Via Condotti in Rome. Those will stay with me forever.
So, this is where I am now, admiring my lovers from afar. Maybe one day I will find out that I have a rich uncle somewhere that died and left me millions so my lovers and I can unite. Or maybe I am in fact distantly related to one of these designers and we will one day find each other, bond over our love of shoes and live happily ever after. Until then I will content myself to look at their images on the computer whenever I feel the need.
Although, come to think of it, they do cheat on me a lot with other feet. Some with feet that are way uglier than mine and some with famous feet (stupid golddiggers). Ah, who am I kidding? I love them anyway.
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